I’m about to inflict another unrelated, incoherent list without as much as a warning. Take this.
1.) I inhabit a parallel universe for the most part of the day. In said universe, I’m the protagonist, I always say the funniest things and I have doting friends and family. In this version of The Secret Life Of Walter Mitty, I may not swoosh down from the air and rescue people from calamities and disasters, but I kind of make their day with my charming presence and wit. I heal broken hearts with sinful brownies that I whip up in my cozy chic kitchen. And brighten up weary souls with stellar home cooked meals as I regale them with interesting stories, great conversations and soul-stirring music. Sometimes, when the stars are aligned, my secret life and real life merge like a dream and even as I revel in it, I know it’s short-lived, temporary as all things in life, and life itself. I flit between these universes and I think they feed off each other in a strange way. This is not just useless distraction, as I see it; to me, this is insightful, it is a means of self-improvement, and it’s also a kind of mental rehearsal. But most importantly, the person in that secret universe is who I aspire to be. Living in it gives me hope, strength and makes me feel like I’m closer to becoming that person, that this is all possible. And that, my friends, is enough. A life ripe with possibilities.
2.) I sometimes come up with really cool, interesting thoughts or a great joke, but I don’t say it right away if it’s a private conversation with just one person. I feel like that thought deserves to be shared with a larger audience who’ll appreciate it better. (Bring on the applause and the standing ovation.) So I hold it and wait endlessly for said opportunity to present itself. It’s not like I’m going to address a Ted Talk, but hey, you’ll never know, right? Why do I do this? Because I want people to know that it’s mine. The thought, the words, it’s all me. I wouldn’t want someone stealing it and taking credit for it. I’m vain, like that.
3.) I’m all for self improvement but I cannot stand people who speak like they’ve ingested every cheesy self-help book in the world. I have friends who speak in self-help jargon (read gibberish) of aligning their past self with their present and extension of identity beyond societal norms and for the life of me I don’t get it. Whatever happened to simple, honest talk? The more I hear friends spout such BS, the less I’m inclined to spend time with them, or most of all, trust them. Drop that mask, honey. I can see right through you.
4.) That brings me to honesty, the number one trait I look for in people these days. I’m not in college anymore, so I know that you can’t build everlasting bonds based solely on taste in music, books, movies, food, TV shows and fashion. I just want to meet real people with whom I can be more of myself. I don’t want to be impressed so stop trying to seem cooler than you are. I want to know who you really are. Your deepest fears, your imperfections, your flaws, your dreams, your genuine ideas, thoughts, feelings. I want to be able to share my world without judgement and scorn. And without the need to pretend or be restrained by political correctness. I want to be lost in conversation on things close to my heart and I want to rest assured that the other person has my back always. It’s the kind of community I want to build, where people care for each other and make time for each other, no matter what. And don’t dish out unsolicited parenting advice.
Paperback writer 